Thanksgiving

I was finally out of the hospital for thanksgiving and feeling good enough to enjoy it. Sara and I and Tara went to Sara's folk's place for the holiday of thanks. Sara and I have a lot to be thankful for and much to be saddened over. We are thankful that Sara was and is able to attend school and start on her path towards becoming a nurse. We are thankful for the U of M for that and for kicking my cancer's ass. They are also working on my Cat's tumor; I hope it works.

So, Thank you to the University of Minnesota!!

And now Sara is flocking around me, so she must be trying to kick me off, so she can do homework. More later,
JJ

Disappointing week

This week has been rather hard for us on several fronts. First, we had several appointments, including one with a new pain Doc and another with a new Spine surgeon. After my battle with chronic pain over the last few years, we were hoping that an implanted morphine pump was a final solution, but for several reasons, the doctor will not do it. He believes that I will be too open to a meningitis infection, also he does not believe that the pain I have will be helped by the pump.
The spine doc does not believe that he can do anything for me because I am basically too young for concrete injections and not acute enough for anything else.
Beyond this, are new good friends and are partners on the BMT path have left for home. This is so wonderful for them and we are overjoyed that they get to go home. But, we will miss their presence, their company and especially their understanding. My hope is that our friendship continues for a very long time.
Well, I am gonna go and read. Good night.

The Inevitability of Love

Some heart-breaking news has hit our happy and beautiful home. It seems that Sara and I have already been going through a Jobian experienece, with my Cancer, treatment, recovery, and all else. But, now something else...something much more devastating . Our heart, our love, our wonderful cat Tara is dying of what else, cancer. She has a tumor on her tongue that makes it hard to impossible to eat. The eventual outcome of this cancer is starvation. We already have to spoon feed her or fill a syringe with food and shoot it into her mouth. Unfortunately, it only takes from a week to several months for this cancer to kill. Since Tara is already very small... We have also already noticed a decrease in her eating habits.

Tara has been with us through everything, through all of my pain and all of my joy...she has been my rock and my refuge, she has kept me sane when nothing else would. Anywords that I say about her are too little, not enough, not beautiful enough to describe her heart and her ability to love me and now to love Sara. To say she will be miss is to say the ocean is just water.

My Tara...

My idea of Hell

Or is it the Twilight Zone...